There is always a 'before' and an 'after' in any life, We all have many beginnings and endings in our lifetime but for a lot of people they go unnoticed, for me they were so profound that I feel like I have lived and died a thousand times My first beginning or rather, the first one I recognised was after my son was born and ultimately, it brought about the end of my previous life and it changed the person I used to be. This new beginning with my son was a lesson in life I never want to forget but the price I paid for that knowledge was and still is,too high The ending of my life with Luke was so traumatic that when he died I died with him, and I found it very hard to physically carry on living when I didn't know what I was living for. However in time, a new beginning started to emerge and I somehow found the strength to continue my journey, for him and because of him Luke's daddy had developed multiple sclerosis before luke died and so he needed me more than ever now as the trauma of losing his son had taken its toll on his illness and I found I needed him too so we carried on our lives together without our son, and eventually, through the pain and heartache, we found that laughter had not altogether disappeard but that it visited often and our memories of Luke began to make us smile again. But it didn't last for long and another chapter in my life came to a close when my husband, lukes daddy, died and my life with two beautiful people finally ended. I have another new beginning now, battle scarred and weary I may be but Life has become good again and I will take the lessons I have learned and apply them to this new beginning and make my son and his daddy proud of me